

LIBRARY OF CONGRESS. 


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Farm and Fireside Library. June, 1894. No. 112 
Published monthly by 

Mast, Crowell & Kirkpatrick, Springfield, Ohio. 
Subscription Price, $3 per year. 


Entered at the Post-office at Springfield, Ohio, as 
second-class mail matter. 










SPECTACULAR 

ROMANCES 

\nmHT P ^\ 

28 i 895 j 

irigii-'K 

WILLIAM HOSEA BALLOU, 

Author of “A Ride on a Cyclone” “The Bachelor Girl” “The 
Upper Ten” “An Automatic Wife” etc . 


Copyrighted, 1892, by W. D. Rowland. 




PUBLISHED BY 

MAST, CROWELL & KIRKPATRICK, 


REALISM IS NOT FICTION; 
IT IS JOURNALISM. 


TABLE OF CONTENTS. 

PAGE 

Dedication, to “ Carita” 2 

Chat with the Reader 5 

The Ideal Girl 8 

One Southern Girl . 17 

A Modern Episode ...... 28 

Slept in Two Beds 30 

An Aerial Courtship 32 

The Tramp 40 

The Owl-Trapper's Christmas .... 43 

One Way to Marry 64 

Easter Buds 68 


TO 


0i}<? Su/eet (Memory, 


CARITA. 

The song-bird sang a wondrous ode of praise, 

To God, whose light, whose lustrous morning blaze, 
Set fire to clouds, to forests, nooks and hills 
And all the wastes of Earth, the rocks and rills. 

Her song now low’ and sweet, now loud and clear, 

As chimes of bells or the bold chanticleer, 

Broke through the woods, the clouds, until it stirred 
The Blest Abode, where God and angels heard 0 

And on the topmost twig of the tall tree, 

An angel found her, thrilled with melody, 

And marked for her a token o’er the sod — 

Then bore the wondrous song-bird forth to God. 

— Wm. Hosea Ballou. 


Jl?i 5 l/oIu/T)(? i$ Offered, 



<styat u/itl? Reader. 


A desire to place before the public, specimens of 
the various styles, or better, perhaps, types of short 
stories for comparison and recreation, has led the 
author to present this volume of his creations. In 
so doing he offers several new types of his own as 
indicative of the trend of the modern mind and as 
best adapted to the data of the marvelous civiliza- 
tion of to-day. Many of these stories are in 
imitation of the style of his novel, “A Ride On A 
Cyclone,” which is generally conceded to have met 
with the approval of modern readers who are suffi- 
ciently surfeited with past types of heroes, heroines, 
plots, worn-out descriptive matter, threadbare 
delineations of character, commonplace realism, 
passionism and vulgarity. These stories comprise 
“ The Ideal Girl,” “ An Aerial Courtship,” and 


CHAT WITH T*HE READER. 


“ Love on a Log/' etc. “ The Mystery of Mrs. 
Weak/' will be found to imitate prevailing English 
styles of short stories. “ The Age/’ “ The Owl- 
Trappers Christmas/' “ The Pioneer Maid/' are 
in imitation of the common American magazine 
styles. “One Southern Girl/' will stand as the 
pure and simple type of realism. The storylets 
placed between the stories are in accordance, per- 
haps, with a new idea of the author and will 
relieve the reader’s mind from the tension which 
follows a close attention to longer stories. In 
“ The Jewess,” the author presents an elaborate 
and truthful defence of the Hebrew. In this 
novel, as in “ A Ride On A Cyclone,” the heroine 
demonstrates the masterful intellect of woman, 
the existence of which novelists in general have 
parsimoniously overlooked. Of course, the author 
is prejudiced in favor of his own peculiar type of 
fiction. He believes that in this age of intense 
mental activity, fiction should be fiction, in order 
that the mind may be absolutely drawn by it from 
its every day pursuits. It is only in the stupen- 
dous plot that such absolute relief can be had. 
Around such a plot must be woven corresponding 


CHAT WITH *THE READER. 


great creative ideas and actual pictures of the most 
immense advances of our unparalleled civilization. 
The author believes, too, that he should consecrate 
all his energies to collate the advances of mind, 
both in the human and the lower animal world. 
In order to so better do h,e has attempted to 
master some knowledge of law, medicine, science, 
in all its branches, applied science, philosophy, 
geography, ethnology, changing methods of con- 
ducting commerce and business, politics and what- 
ever concerns the industries of mind. This cannot 
be done merely by reading books and newspapers ; 
but by extensive travel, examinations of papers 
of the great law cases in the higher courts, of 
collections of naturalists and travelers and in talks 
with peoples of all descriptions. This may seem 
like a considerable amount of occupation ; but it is 
what the author has scrupulously performed from 
boyhood with almost the sole purpose of making 
his work worth one’s time to peruse, and to print 
the results in an accurate and condensed form. 
He has no quarrel with the newspapers which 
sometimes deny his facts without the same labor- 
ious investigation. When he knows that he has the 


CHAT WITH THE READER. 

facts as well as the evidence to substantiate them, 
he believes it his duty to present these facts in the 
most condensed form for the use of the reader, 
without elaboration or evidence, in order that the 
interest of the plot may not be hampered and that 
the peruser may not be bored by superfluities. 

W. H. B. 


New York, September 30, 1892. 


Jf?e Ideal (Jirl. 


Miss Angel Food lived on the apex of the peak 
of Mount Sheridan, ten thousand feet above the 
sea. Mount Sheridan is in Wyoming and was 
named after the General on account of its severe 
usage of antagonists who have tried to climb it. 
Miss Food’s only companions were some mountain 
sheep and goats, some ptarmigans, a family of 
grizzlies and a few black buffaloes. She was sit- 
ting on a rock one day enjoying the Indian sum- 
mer, when Mr. Scoop, a New York reporter, 
walked up and took a seat at her side. 

“ Good morning, Mademoiselle ! ” he said, 
briskly. He took off his white plug hat, dried his 
forehead with a handkerchief and lighted a 
cigarette. 

“ Good morning ! ” she replied, in the sweetest 
voice he had ever heard. 


[81 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


9 


“ Hope you don’t mind,” he remarked, puffing 
away vigorously. 

“ Not at all. I don’t find smoke offensive and 
it is a pleasure to see you enjoy it.” 

“ Mademoiselle, you overpower me with such 
courtesy. The modern nuisance is not the smoker 
but the lady who objects to the practice of smok- 
ing. Would you flatter me with your name ? ” 

“ Angel Food.” 

“ Astonishing ! Let me make a note of it. 
— Found a girl on Mount Sheridan, ten thousand 
feet above the sea, by the name of Angel Food. 
Extraordinary ! And she doesn’t object to smoking. 
Wonderful ! — I say Miss Food, would you mind 
telling how the deuce — I beg pardon — how you 
ever got up here ? ” 

“ I never got up here.” 

“ But you are here.” 

“ True ; I have always lived here.” 

“ Goodness ! wait until I put that down. Could 
you let me see a late newspaper? I have been 
traveling through the mountains some days and 
have lost track of civilization.” 

“I Jo not subscribe for any publications. I 


10 


THE IDEAL GIRL. 


never saw a newspaper, book or any printed mat- 
ter in my life.” 

“ Not so fast, please. I want to get that mar- 
velous statement down. Are you married ? ” 

“ No sir, you are the first man I ever saw.” 

The reporter stopped to whistle a moment, and 
began to look around for a telegraph office. 
There was none within five hundred miles, and for 
a moment he perspired until he remembered that 
there were no reporters within a thousand 
miles. 

“ Could I be presented to your parents ? ” he 
ventured. 

“ I have never known any.” 

“ Come now, my dear Miss Angel Food. The 
New York papers admire reasonable sensations, 
but this is a little brisk, even for the Metropolis.” 

“ Are you from New York, and a reporter ? ” 

“ Yes.” 

“ How did you get to the top ?” 

“ Natural result of being a reporter.” 

“ I mean to the top of the mountain ? ” 

“ Walked up.” 

“ But you are the first person that ever climbed 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


11 


this mountain; the first human being I have ever 
seen.” 

“ Mademoiselle, pause a moment while I write it 
down. You must sign the statements and make 
affidavits. May I ask if you have any compan- 
ions ? ” 

“ Plenty of them — goats, ptarmigans, griz- 
zlies” . 

“ Grizzlies ! ” yelled Mr. Scoop, springing upon 
the top of the highest rock. “ Did you say griz- 
zlies ?” 

“ Yes ; be calm. I am on the bear side of the 
market and we live amicably together.” 

“ But what will become of me ? ” 

“ Oh, they never squeeze shorts, and reporters 
have liberties on account of their profession. 
Calm yourself, pray.” 

The reporter sat down and gazed around. 
Four hundred peaks rose from eight thousand to 
fourteen thousand feet high, in the vast expanse 
about him. Some were crowned with perpetual 
snows. At his feet rolled the waters which made 
their way to the Gulf of California, the Gulf of 
Colorado and the Gulf of Mexico. To the north 


12 


THE IDEAL GIRL. 


was the Yellowstone Park and its geysers, 
throwing up steam and water hundreds of feet. 
Within the scope of vision were fifty thousand 
square miles, which the rarity of the atmosphere 
brought out distinctly. He made a note of it, and 
turned to the beautiful being untainted by civiliza- 
tion. 

“ Sweet mountain maid,” he murmured, “ who 
are you ? What are you ? Tell me the story of 
your life.” 

She turned and looked with curiosity on this 
mortal like herself, yet so utterly her opposite in 
sex and education. 

“ I have no story to tell,” she said. “ Per- 
haps my story is yet to be. Are you not to 
write it ? ” 

For a few moments he was lost in thought. 
Then he took up his pencil and continued the 
interview. “ And so,” he remarked, “ you know 
nothing of the life of the modern girl ? ” 

“ Nothing ! ” 

“ You never went to a boarding school and 
with your girl chum had a clandestine champagne 
supper in your room at night with two young men 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


13 


admitted through your window by means of a 
rope ? ” 

“ Never ! ” 

“ You haven’t chewed gum or slate pencils ? ” 

“ I never saw such articles.” 

“ Never went to the opera or theatre night after 
night at the expense of poor fellows who spent all 
their salaries for boxes, flowers, carriages and 
Delmonico dinners ? ” 

“ I know not what you mean.” 

“ Never trifled with a man’s affections until 
he implored your hand in marriage, and then 
drove him out to suicide or cynicism, with the 
assurance that you would be his sister but not his 
wife ? ” 

“ You are the first young man I ever saw.” 

“ Who pays for your bonnets, Paris gowns, your 
jewelry ? ” 

“ I weave my garments from the sage bush.” 

“ Who pays for your maid, your groceries, your 
mansion, your liveries? ” 

“ I do my own work, live on the milk of the 
goat, live in the hollow of the rock with its sides 
of quartz, and walk, not ride.” 


14 


THE IDEAL GIRL. 


“ Could I get you to correspond with me when 
I leave ? ” 

“ If you are an honorable man.” 

“ Would you write to me as you really think 
and feel ? ” 

“ When I know you are honorable I will write 
to you as if I were consigning my thoughts to 
oblivion.” 

“ Is there a soda fountain or an ice cream palace 
or oyster saloon about where we can refresh our- 
selves ? ” 

“ I never drink or eat at such places.” 

“ Then there can be none about. Such shops 
could not amass a fortune without at least one girl 
customer. What is your dot ? ” 

“Sir?” 

“ How much are you worth ? ” 

“ I own this mountain. It is filled with 
gold, and the walls of my room sparkle with 
nuggets.” 

“ Sweet maid, be mine, I pray you.” 

' “ I will.” 

“ When ? ” 

“ To-day.” 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


15 


“ You do not desire to send abroad for a 
trousseau ? ” 

“ I have my own made by my hand.” 

“ You do not desire a year in which to break as 
many hearts as possible, and a promise to keep 
the engagement secret so you can flirt in security ? ” 

"I would break no hearts, nor flirt. Let us 
sign a legal contract of marriage in the absence of 
a priest.” 

“ But, sweet friend, you know nothing about me. 
I love you at sight, because you are ten thousand 
feet above your sex in general.” 

“ I need to know nothing about you, except 
that I love you. Love is independent of circum- 
stances and environment. It should have no 
reason for its existence, no consideration at all, 
except the fact. We are as we are without one 
plea. The cactus clings to the lofty sands, ground 
of the rocks, but we know not why. Love is like 
the cactus, because it is unreasonable of growth. 

I love the reporter because he knows all the 
world. He loves me, because I never knew there 
was a world. Are you satisfied ? ” 

“ I am, my Angel ; but because I know all the 


16 


THE IDEAL GIRL. 


world, let me stay here with you and forever 
forget its evil ? ” 

“ No, dear ; take me all over the world, because 
it is all new to me.” 

“ I beg you to consider and let me stay.” 

“ I pray you to take me or go alone. 

“ Alas ! here is a woman that appeals to reason 
as she is, but like woman, must be unreasonable at 
the last.” 

“ Ah, me ! I was happy until a man brought 
me a world of unhappiness. I will flee and hide 
forever in my palace.” 

Mr Scoop looked around, but only his guides 
were visible, just climbing over the crest a hun- 
dred feet away. The beautiful ideal had fled and 
disappeared. After a vain search, Mr. Scoop 
descended and in four days of mad haste reached a 
telegraph office. His story appeared in a New 
York daily the next day. At noon he received 
the following dispatch from the proprietor of the 
paper: 

“ Return to New York at once. We want a 
champion liar for the affidavit room.” 


Ope Souttyerp (Jirl. 


Miss Blase Ennui was the belle of Virginia, a 
girl of conquest, beautiful, brilliant in conver- 
sational powers, and refined. She went fishing in 
the society of the world for its most interesting 
men. With animal men, those with coarse faces 
and eyes full with lust, she had nothing to do. 
If a man was a genius, or distinguished as a 
litterateur , a scientist, a diplomat, a statesman, or 
even as a resistible flirt, he was fish for her net 
and she caught him, played with him until she 
was tired, and then, if possible, attached him to 
her long train of devotees. She was bored by 
men who loved the cup to excess, who ate too 
heavily, who had only wealth and time on their 
hands, who were egotistic, who talked about them- 
selves, or posed before the drawing-room mirrors, 

[ 17 ] 


18 


ONE SOUTHERN GIRL. 


or strutted about displaying person, jewelry or 
vulgarity. She liked best, men of masterful intel- 
lect, wealth enough to maintain position, men who, 
while observing the proprieties of life, were not 
too conventional, men who ministered to the 
tastes of ladies and herself in particular in the 
items of flowers, amusements, dinners, dances and 
conversation. Whenever she met a man who out- 
did the others, her standard was raised accord- 
ingly, and she kept him in her net, close on the 
bosom of her intimacy and friendship until she 
met one more surpassing. When men proposed 
marriage she did not insult them by saying, “ I 
cannot love you, but will be your sister,” or, “ I 
pity you so much, it grieves me to disappoint 
you,” or, “ You will meet some sweet, lovely girl 
who will make your life far happier,” or, “ Had I 
known or suspected in the faintest degree that you 
cared for me I would have spared you this.” On 
the contrary her answer was, “ Leave me utterly 
for two years, and, if you still feel in the same 
bilious temperament, come back to me.” N It is 
safe to say that no man ever came back after so 
long a time, and the more he pondered on the 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


19 


word “ bilious,” as applied to him, the madder he 
got at first and the more convinced he was later 
of her good sense. 

There came a time in the life of Miss Blase 
Ennui when she recognized the fact that she must 
marry very soon or lose her golden opportunity. 
She was not blind to the fact that men like the 
best years of a woman’s life, which she had squan- 
dered in study of the male character for her per- 
sonal amusement and pleasure. Still, she believed 
that hers was a ripe, golden womanhood, and if 
she could meet a man of a little higher type than 
she had yet known, she would tie him fast in her 
net. 

Such an individual as she pictured pressed his 
face against her glass of time at last. Mr. Self 
Content was a most extraordinary example of his 
own name. He cared not what happened, for 
what had happened, or for what might happen. 
Whether it rained or snowed, shined or was sultry, 
was all the same to him. He had, like herself, 
traveled everywhere. He had advanced with the 
progress and culture of the age. He was a reason- 
able devotee of society. He had perfect taste in 


20 


ONE SOUTHERN GIRL. 


matters of dress, forms and proprieties of life. He 
was not obstrusive, nor a bore, nor given to excess 
in anything. He made use of his talents to the 
very limit of their capacity for good. He could 
sing a song divinely, paint a landscape exquisitely, 
write a creative poem or essay, make the leading 
postprandial speech, take the seat with credit of 
any professor of a university, fill the presiding 
office of the Senate or House with dignity, outwit 
any known diplomat, edit a great newspaper, 
plead at the bar with a Choate, or umpire a game 
of base-ball to the satisfaction of the players and 
spectators. Once he filled the place of Edwin 
Booth in Hamlet so loftily that the great actor 
was not missed, and again acted as substitute for 
Dixey in the part of Adonis in such a manner 
as to make Henry Irving forget his own exist- 
ence. 

Miss Blase Ennui was entranced at the first 
meeting, so was Mr. Self Content. As he grew in 
her estimation, she failed to advance beyond his 
first and piercing reading of her whole high 
character. She determined to marry this man. 
He had no determinations in life of any description, 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


21 


except to fill out each hour as becomes a man. 
He looked at all women with his hands in his 
pockets, as it were. He always did his best and 
the proper thing; and because of this, whether he 
pleased or displeased, were results quite indifferent 
to him. He had his ideas of life and of the motives 
which govern conduct. He carried out his idea 
strictly, and easily reasoned that those who differed 
from him were wrong. It may be said, that in his 
case he was right, for those motives which govern 
the conduct of women in general have been 
demonstrated as without reason. 

Miss Blase Ennui was, however, fixed in the 
principles which govern the conduct of girls from 
her section. Although she loved, she did not pro- 
pose to vary her conduct — the conduct which was 
taught every girl of Virginia — on his account. 
Among other things, she believed it the duty of the 
lover to follow whither she went, be it to the 
resort in summer, to Washington in winter or 
abroad between times; also, that in correspondence 
the lover should tell what was in his heart, while 
she should only write what might be read by the 
whole world, and if she ever demanded her letters 


22 


ONE SOUTHERN GIRL. 


he must send them, but not expect the return of 
his own. 

The couple, while together, were content with 
each other. They made no effort to conceal 
their mutual happiness in each others presence. 
He constantly sought her society, murmuring 
“ come what comes.” She ever accepted his 
companionship with the thought, “ go and he will 
follow.” 

She became tired of Washington when society 
did, and went to Newport. At the parting each 
merely said a pleasant word, as if “ it,” whatever 
“ it ” is, was quite understood. There was no 
suggestion of correspondence, but she was not sur- 
prised to receive a soulful letter from him shortly 
after arriving at Newport. During the next week 
she got another soulful letter, but he said noth- 
ing about following on to Newport. Surprised, 
she wrote him a note of the most approved Virginia 
style, merely interrogating him as to when she 
might expect him. In the course of a few days 
she received another soulful letter giving a bona 
fide reason for the impossibility of his presence at 
Newport, saying that he had accepted a diplomatic 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


23 


office at Washington to meet the ambassadors of 
several nations, and would be detained indefinitely. 
Miss Blase Ennui was, of course, a trifle disap- 
pointed. “ What was the necessity of a man so 
honored,” she thought, “ accepting even the highest 
diplomatic office of the government? Was not 
the wooing of her more important ? ” However, 
there were plenty of interesting men at Newport, 
and feeling sure of her fish, she swam in the sea 
of adulation which extends from shore to shore of 
modern society. She knew he would be faithful, 
and what matter how she passed her time ? Being 
so busy, it was natural that she should forget to 
write him for several weeks ; then she answered 
his soulful letters a la Virginia style, committing 
no other sentiments on paper than would float, like a 
feather, before the public if ever published or shown 
to others. She received another soulful letter from 
Mr. Self Content, but thereafter became surprised 
that he wrote so few letters. After a time she 
answered in her own airy style, paying no heed 
to his passionate utterances. “ Of course,” she 
thought, “if he will not follow he doesn’t deserve 
a direct reply, and if he did, he knows it is not 


24 


ONE SOUTHERN GIRL. 


proper in Virginia to commit a girl's self on 
paper." 

Mr. Self Content contented himself in Washing- 
ton and imagined that he saw through this girl, 
her whole motives and her Virginia style. He, 
in truth, cared very little about matrimony per- 
sonally, and made up his mind to dispense with 
the luxury of a modern wife. Still, he felt it his 
duty to expose the shallow pretense of Virginia 
customs to this surpassing woman and let her go 
her way in peace, never to cross his path again if 
he could prevent it. He concluded to write to 
her once more, in such terms as would imply no 
necessity on her part for an. answer. The sub- 
stance of his letter was as follows : 

“ We come from two distinct civilizations, you 
and I. Yours is the Virginia one, mine the New 
York. In your section the man is expected to 
follow his loved one whither caprice takes her, 
await the termination of her endless flirtations, 
and when she has wrecked as many of the lives of 
mankind as will satisfy her greed, receive the 
wreck of her own as his wife. I come from 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


25 


a reciprocal civilization which demands of the 
woman her full share of the love-making and which 
indicates to the man that he is worthy of some 
effort on her part to win him. I would even sac- 
rifice without a murmur this high office of the 
government to be at your side, were it not for 
your utter selfishness as is indicated in these brief, 
idealess notes which come as answers to the very 
emotions of my heart. You know my history. 
You know absolutely that I am an honest, 
honorable man. You ought to know that any 
expression you might put on paper would be as safe 
in the hands of an honorable man as if you thrust 
them in the fire. Even if Robert E. Lee did teach 
to the girls of the South never to put on paper 
what they would not have the whole world see, he 
erred in part. Your notes to me have only one 
import, and to the effect that I am dishonorable 
and unworthy of your confidence. I will not tol- 
erate such a reflection on my character, not even 
to win the jewel of women. It ought to stand to 
the lasting disgrace of any woman to marry a man 
to whom she would not write any thought she 
might utter. With Thomas Carlyle, I say to you, 


26 


ONE SOUTHERN GIRL. 


as he did when W. H. Mallock, author of ‘ Is Life 
Worth Living?' called on him: 'I am glad to 
have seen you as a curiosity, but I desire never to 
meet you again/ In the hope that at Newport 
you will breathe the air of reciprocation/' etc., etc. 

Down on the beach at Newport, Miss Blase 
Ennui read the cold-blooded letter. There were 
dozens of men around her, interesting, it is true, 
but she felt in her heart of hearts that, though the 
customs of Virginia and the teachings of Lee are 
correct, Nature's noblemen were scarce and that 
there was only one Mr. Self Content whom she 
pictured sailing past forever beyond her call in 
that dimmest of ships on the farthest horizon. 

After a moment’s thought she took a Southern 
girl’s privilege and penned a reply : 

“I have been very much interested in your 
letter,” she wrote, “ and have fixed the date of our 
marriage for next Christmas. The time to adjust 
differences between engaged people is after the 
ceremony. Sincerely, 


Blase Ennui/ 


/ 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 27 

“ She sticks to that blasted signature, ‘ sin- 
cerely,’ ” muttered Mr. Self Content, content- 
edly, “ but I wouldn’t fail to be present at 
that ceremony for the Secretaryship of State 
itself.” 


f{ /T\oderp £pisod<^. 


“ Where do you attend church ? ” 

“ At the Unity/' 

“ Are you a member ? ” 

“ Oh, dear, yes ! and you should have been there 
at my baptism. Mamma had a gorgeous bonnet 
and apparel imported from Paris especially for the 
occasion. Why, when she took; the bonnet and 
held it aloft while my head was being sprinkled, 
you should have heard the suppressed exclamations 
of admiration in the audience. After service all 
the girls went into ecstasies over it.” 

“ How do you like the Sunday-school there ? ” 

“ Oh, it is delightful ! I have a class and 
mamma arrays me bewitchingly, and the young 
men look over my way more than they do at 
[ 28 ] 


A MODERN EPISODE. 


29 


Beryl McVeigh, which makes her too awfully mad 
for anything. You just ought to join us.” 

“ I think I will. I have seriously contemplated 
it for some time and now am convinced it is my 
duty.” 


Slept ip 3u/o Beds. 


Mr. Sack departed for a hotel after a night at 
the Club. He had imbibed so freely that he 
preferred sleeping at the hotel, as he surmised 
that his sweet wife and idol awaited him at home 
with a pair of tongs. He was mellowed and 
happy. There were two beds in the room 
assigned to him. Under the pillow of the bed he 
selected he placed his watch and pocket-book con- 
taining eight hundred dollars. He had not been 
asleep long before he awoke in a wild delirium of 
thirst and took a glass of ice- water. Uncon- 
sciously he got into the other bed. At noon, 
when he arose, he looked under his pillow. 
Of course his valuables were not there. Rushing 
down-stairs he breathlessly sought the landlord. 

[ 30 ] 


spectacular romances. 


31 


“ Where in is the rascal that slept in the 

other bed in my room/’ he gasped. 

“ Don’t know,” yawned the landlord. 

“Don’t know? Why, he has robbed me and 
fled,” yelled Mr. Sack. “ Come right up-stairs. 
He has taken my watch and eight hundred 
dollars.” 

The pair hastened to the room. “Why,” said 
the landlord, “You must have been visited by 
thieves. Where did you put ’em.” 

“ Right under this,” said Sack, going to the first 
bed and raising the pillow ; there lay the valuables 
just as he had left them. 

“ Why, damme,” he muttered, suspiciously. “ I 
must have slept in two beds last night. I say, 
landlord ! Order anything you want but don’t 
tell the fellows. What would the old woman 
say to this ? ” Then he went home and told his 
wife he had been reading poetry and got carried 
past the station to Poughkeepsie. 


f\r) ferial <$ourtsl?ip. 


Almost the entire city was in flames. On the 
top of the roof of a dwelling-house sat Mr. Charles 
Kingman, a young litterateur of wide celebrity. 
He was seated on a bench placed there for the 
occupants of the house to use during hot summer 
nights. A few squares around him were still 
untouched by the fire, but it was evident that these, 
in the very center of the sea of flame, must soon 
be consumed. Mr. Kingman calmly smoked a 
cigar and watched with interest the sublime 
spectacle of many square miles of fearful sheets of 
fire. He glanced at his watch and saw that it was 
about ten in the evening. Occasionally he thrust 
his hands in his pockets and sauntered aimlessly 
around taking a mental image of the picture. 

“ What a chance for a descriptive bit of effort 

[ 32 ] 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


33 


here,” he mused. “ Hang it ! how unlucky to have 
no friends along who are capable of appreciating 
such grandeur.” 

Over on a neighboring roof he heard the sound 
of a falling scuttle-door. He glanced in the 
direction and observed a young woman emerge. 
She looked around in a stupefied way, saw him 
and sprang to meet him. 

“ Oh, sir, is it not terrible ! Can you not save 
me ? Are we cut off from all hope of rescue ? ” 

“ Terrible, Miss ? It is terribly sublime, if you 
will permit the expression. Come and sit down 
with me and enjoy the spectacle.’’ 

“ But we shall perish in a few minutes. See, the 
flames are approaching us on four sides with fear- 
ful rapidity. We shall perish ! ” 

“ What of it ? ” 

“ Are you not afraid ? ” 

“ Of what ? ” 

“ Death.” 

“ Got to die some time, Miss.” 

“ Miss Markham. Hester Markham.” 

“ Well, Miss Markham sit down. There, now, 
make yourself comfortable and enjoy the spectacle. 


84 


AN AERIAL COURTSHIP. 


Did you ever see such an ocean of flame ? and look 
away up in the zenith. There are myriads of 
sparks arid timbers floating in flames miles high — 
isn’t it glorious ? ” 

“ Y ou are a brave man and compel me to be 
calm. Y es, it is the most sublime spectacle Chicago 
ever witnessed. So we must die enjoying it.” 

“ Perhaps not.” 

“ Oh, sir ! is there hope of escape ? ” 

“ One chance in a million.” 

“ Please tell me what it is.” 

“ It is wonderful how a woman’s curiosity is 
paramount even in times of excitement. Do you 
really wish to be saved from a glorious death like 
this ? ” 

“ More than I ever wished for anything in my 
life.” 

He turned and scrutinized the girl closely. He 
first gazed at the back of her neck, to see if the 
base of the hair pleased him. A sallow neck 
underneath the hair at this point invariably turned 
him from a woman. Miss Markham, however, 
was an exception. She had not overlooked the 
back of her neck, where the hair grew luxuriously 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


35 


low down, and was as beautifully arranged as in 
front. Then he examined the face, the contour of 
the head and the bumps over the eyes. They 
were all pleasing objects. She was quite beauti- 
ful and evidently possessed of a lofty intelligence, 
and refined. 

“ Miss Markham,” he said, “ I have a theory. 
Will you do exactly as I say, crush out all fear, 
and take your chances with me ? ” 

“ I will,” she said, in a desperate tone that 
convinced him. 

“ Then my first duty is to tie you to the 
bench.” 

He took a long rope, evidently of the new 
fire-escape pattern, and lashed her firmly and 
quickly to the bench. Then he sat very close to 
her and lashed himself, leaving the arms and 
legs of each entirely free. He glanced at his 
watch. 

“ I estimate,” he said, “ that in five or ten 
minutes the great whirlwind which is sweeping 
those cinders and burning debris miles through 
the air, will have its vortex very near us. Do not 
be scared, but gather calmness from me." 


36 


AN AERIAL COURTSHIP. 


He lighted a fresh cigar and puffed away in 
great enjoyment. The weed was delicious. 

“ Won’t you let me hold your hand,” she said, 
“ it will give me some of your bravery. It will 
ease away the terrors of death.” 

There was a sudden and fearful rush of hot wind. 
It swept along with cyclonic strength, knocking 
over chimneys and walls. As the square in which 
the pair were sitting was engulfed in a sea of flame, 
the whirlwind gathered up the bench and its occu- 
pants and in an instant they were sailing in the air, 
far above the vast area of fire. At the moment 
of departure the man clasped the girl in his arms, 
placed her head on his breast and whispered, softly: 
“ We have escaped. Have no fears now.” 

“ I no longer fear,” she said. Disengaging 
herself she looked back and tears came to her 
eyes. “ Yonder is the destruction of all my hopes 
in life, all I valued, my worldly wealth, my friends, 
my relatives and kin.” 

“ And your husband ? ” 

“ No ; I am not married ; only out in society a 
year.” 

“ How is it that one so lovely, and so brave a 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


37 


girl as yourself has escaped matrimony even a 
year r 

“ Perhaps I have been foolish, but I love a 
man I have never seen.” 

“ What is that I hear ? ” 

“ I have been reading tne works of an author 
and love him though he is unknown to me.” 

“ That is somewhat extraordinary. Might I 
inquire his name ? ” 

“ It is but a foolish passion. I ought not to 
have referred to it.” 

“ Can you not trust me after the events of 
to-night ?” 

“ With all my heart ; besides we are likely to 
break our necks when we strike the earth. We 
cannot float forever at this altitude — and it won’t 
make any difference then.” 

“ I see you are becoming philosophic, which 
excites my admiration. I assure you our necks are 
safe. We shall descend into Lake Michigan and 
paddle ashore. His name, please ? ” 

“ Charles Kingman.” 

“ Extraordinary ! May I inquire what qualifica- 
tions you possess for the wife of a litterateur ? ” 


38 


AN AERIAL COURTSHIP. 


“ I am thoroughly in sympathy with his work. 
I think in the same line he does and complete all 
his undeveloped lines of thought.” 

“ But it is usual for men of genius to marry 
fools. Y ou are too good for the wife of a littera- 
teur!' 

“ I can tell you why they marry fools.” 

“ Why ? ” taking her hand. 

“ Because girls think it policy to express oppo- 
sition views to such men, and they, having so much 
opposition, draw themselves into their shells as it 
were.” 

“ That is right. I always felt, though I knew 
the young ladies were displaying their intelligence, 
that I never could or would marry a woman who 
paraded with my enemies and opposers. I get 
nothing but opposition in life and certainly would 
not marry into a nest of it. No wonder such men 
marry fools in preference. I thought I should not 
marry at all because I never met a girl who sympa- 
thized with me.” 

“ You ? a genius or a litterateur ? ” 

“ So you say.” 

“ I ? ” withdrawing her hand. 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


39 


“ Yes. Let me hold your hand, dear. I feel 
the cold air of the lake. We are settling fast.” 

“ I said you were a genius ? ” 

“ You said you loved Charles Kingman and 
gave such reasons for it and have conducted your- 
self so bravely and shown yourself to be such a 
true and helpful companion to him that he loves 
you in return.” Taking her in his arms. 

“Are you Charles Kingman?” she whispered, 
rapturously. 

“ Yes, dearest,” cutting the ropes and drawing 
her completely on the bench. 

Splash ! 

The man calmly paddled with one hand. Day- 
light broke. They were not in the lake, but in the 
mouth of a river. A big house stood on the shore. 
As the bench approached a gentleman in clerical 
attire came out and met them on the beach. 

“ Are you a clergyman ? ” queried Mr. Kingman. 

“ I am,” was the reply, helping them ashore. 

“ Just the man we want,” said Mr. Kingman. 
“We came over from Chicago on purpose to get 
married.” 


Sramp, 


CHAPTER I. THE LAW. 

“ Go on now ! Don’t take up any of the 
precious time of this corner.” 

“ Thanks, Mr. Policeman, for it’s the first words 
a mortal has spoken to me to-day.” 

It is a wretchedly dressed creature, wandering 
about the street — a male — why call it a man ? 
Are men made of rags ; with grinded, torn hands ; 
faces bruised and sore ; pockets and stomachs 
empty ? Not now. Only when the dust of ages 
is permeated with that of their bones, when 
antiquarians excavate a lantern or tub and write 
down a Diogenes or a Socrates are they called 
men. 


f40] 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


4 


CHAPTER II. AN EXCEPTION. 

“ Please, sir, give me a dime for lodging. 1 
have had nothing to eat for two days. I can stand 
it without food for a little longer, but I must have 
sleep.” 

“ Here, man, don’t lie ; take this quarter and 
buy whiskey. That’s what you want. 

The “ man ” grat ed the money ferociously. 
He spent a little of it r bread, and entered a vile 
cellar. Men— animals were crowded on bunks 
trying to sleep. Some were groaning, others 
cursing, many smoking a cheap, nauseating com- 
pound for tobacco. A sickening odor pervaded 
the foul place. 

“ How much ? ” 

“ Ten cents. Only one bunk left — number 
twelve. Cash in advance.” 

CHAPTER III THE MESSENGER. 

The victim settled in the narrow, filthy bunk. 
Exhausted, slumber stilled him instantly. The 
dim light burned lower. Malarial, disease-germed 


42 


THE TRAMP. 


air, spectre -like, wrought havoc. Morning came 
at last. 

“ Here, policeman, one man for the morgue 
to-day — number twelve ” 

“ Any record ? ” 

“ Naw ! didn’t leave his card.” 

“ Another case of starvation. Can’t even sell 
him to the medics. No flesh on his bones. 
Dump him on the heap.” 


Ou/l-Jrapper’5 Q?ristma5. 


“ Mother, we may have to eat baked owl for 
our Christmas dinner this year ! There seems to 
be no chance for any other meat.” 

The mother smiled. “ Even owls may be 
unable to get out in these snows ; and if there 
were plenty of them to be had, besides those you 
have secured, I doubt if you would be able to pick 
any flesh from them. An owl is a combination of 
bones, feathers and muscles. The very thought 
of eating one is disgusting.” 

“ But listen to this ! ” The boy produced a torn 
and battered newspaper, the only one that had 
entered the house for several months. “ Here are 
the head lines of a Chicago paper, the article itself 
being torn out : 


[ 43 ] 


44 


THE OWL— TRAPPER’S CHRISTMAS. 


OWL SOUP. 

REWARDS OF CHICAGO HOTELS HOW THEY OUTBID TAXIDERMISTS 

IN THE MARKET BUYING OWLS AND USING THEM FOR 

SOUP SUSCEPTIBLE GUESTS WHO GET TURTLE 

SOUP BREWED OF OWLS.’ ” 

The mothers worn and anxious face again 
lighted with smiles. She could neither resist nor 
dampen the buoyant spirits of her hopeful son. 
When there was nothing but a potato to eat, he 
roasted it in the ashes and acted as if he had dined 
like a king. With clothing so patched and ragged 
that the fierce winds found many entrances in, he 
tramped through the snows unconcerned, and by 
the light of a blood root in the humble abode at 
night, dilated on his future at the academy and 
university. The good dame stopped in her house- 
keeping — not a very extensive labor in her case — - 
and said quietly : “ My dear, perhaps it would be 
best to kill your owls and attempt to eat them 
Christmas, if for no other reason, because it is 
difficult to feed them and us.” % 

A pained expression passed over the boy’s face. 
On his owls, which he had trapped during the long 
and weary November and December, he based his 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


45 


hopes of securing money for at least a year's study 
at the academy. His hobby was a source of 
amusement for all the Little Salmon River neigh- 
borhood. He had acquired the sobriquet of “ owl- 
trapper for his persistent labor. Day after day 
he had tramped through the deep snows with an 
old army musket across his shoulders, and at night 
was often seen returning with a string of dead owls 
on his back, the gun fastened across his breast by 
a rope passed around his neck, while under each arm 
he carried his entrapped live owls — often four at a 
time. 

Little Salmon River rises in a big forest in Oswego 
County, N. Y. It makes its way to Lake Ontario 
where the surf pounds on the huge rocks in 
Mexico Bay. Along this coast, so beautiful in 
summer, so grand and wild in winter, when the ice 
piles up in immense masses to a height of a 
hundred feet or more, and resembles land-locked 
bergs, there are occasional marshes overgrown 
with dense forests. The blizzards of the North and 
Northwest sweep down on this coast in winter and 
bury it deep within their snows, which still rise 
above the farm fences in the spring, long after the 


46 


THE OWL-TRAPPER’S CHRISTMAS. 


robins have reached the latitude of Syracuse, thirty 
miles to the south. 

Near the coast stood the humble abode of the 
Child family, whose scion was called the “ owl- 
trapper.’’ Along the snow-buried highways the 
farmers were only able to feed and water their 
stock, occasionally hauling wood from the forests, 
and idling away the long winter around the 
kitchen stove. The corn had long since been 
husked. The last of the pumpkins had been 
dressed for the winter pies. The apples had all 
been prepared, and dried on the walls, except a 
few in jealously-guarded barrels in the cellars. 
Now and then a few hardy men attacked the hem- 
locks in the forest with cross-cut saws, and pre- 
pared a few logs for spring hauling to the mill. 
The little hamlet next to the lake on the Little 
Salmon’s estuary, boasted of a church, and one 
store, where the most daring of the idlers gathered 
in early evenings, chewed cheap plug, and expec- 
torated with unerring aim on the box stove, much 
to the ill-concealed disgust of the proprietor and 
postmaster, who suffered silently in exchange for 
the small amounts paid for oil, tobacco, stamps, 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


47 


and codfish. The little shipping in the estuary, 
composed of fish-boats, yawls and skiffs, with pos- 
sibly a sloop belonging to some outside pleasure 
seeker, was frozen solidly in the ice and buried in 
the snows, only distinguishable by an occasional 
mast showing its top ball in the air. At the 
mouth of the estuary the enormous ice banks 
broke into high-lifted heads, and showed a terrific 
conflict for supremacy between the current-borne 
ice of the river and the surf-borne ice of the lake. 

The Child cottage was attached to a single acre 
of land, which yielded a frugal supply of potatoes 
‘for the winter use of the widow and son. The 
widow came under the all-present “ poor but 
respectable ” class so common in this country. A 
small building in the rear of the cottage served as 
barn room for a sleek cow, which yielded susten- 
ance to the family, and during the winter com- 
prised, with the potatoes, its sole support.' It was 
a case of the survival of the fittest between the 
cow on one side and the widow and son on the 
other. If the milk of the cow were not used 
almost solely to make butter, there would be no 
fund to purchase hay ; so the skim milk and the 


48 THE OWL-TRAPPER’S CHRISTMAS. 

buttermilk was all the widow could claim for food, 
and the remainder was churned for butter, and the 
butter went to pay for the cow’s hay. 

It is sufficent to say that Mrs. Child was the 
widow of a once-noted and prosperous Methodist 
preacher. With the approach of old age, the par- 
son, as usual, was classed as a “ supernumerary,” 
and reduced in pastorate and salary. Then he 
was “ superannuated,” and left to secure his own 
charge, which resulted in the “ opportunity ” to 
preach in the independent little church and get what 
he could out of the liberality of his constituent 
hearers. A half dollar at collections, an occasional 
ham at pig-sticking, a load of doubtful wood, a 
chance at abandoned windfalls in the orchards, or 
at potatoes likely to be caught in the frpst, com- 
prised his salary — unless the annual donation could 
be added. The donation was a community affair, 
at which the whole neighborhood filled his house 
and church, and brought chicken pies, pans of 
baked beans, bags of doughnuts, slices of bacon, 
cakes and pies, and ate everything visible, except, 
perhaps, half a cake, leaving the parson’s wife to 
clean up the crumbs and crusts. The parson died. 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


49 


The widow exchanged his span of horses of uncer- 
tain age and speed, together with the rickety 
buggy, for the almost abandoned cottage and lot 
on which a village attorney held a mortgage. 
The man got the horses and buggy for his slender 
claim to the title ; the widow got the property and 
the mortgage. The man thought she ought to 
throw in the cow, but even the grief-stricken widow 
made a reservation in favor of that animal. The 
attorney holding the mortgage informed her that 
he took cows for interest in the absence of cash. 

The widow, however, had one piece of property 
that was genuine. It was her fifteen-year-old boy 
Jim, the owl-trapper. There was no mortgage on 
him, and it did not take him more that a year to 
wipe out the mortgage with money that he earned, 
assisted by his stout little hands and heart. The 
village loafers liked him, notwithstanding the fun 
they made of him. They could not understand 
how a small boy could work nights and mornings, 
study in the district school all day, read volumes of 
histories and biographies, and still “ knock out ” a 
mortgage and support his mother and a cow. The 
loafer is not supposed to understand the stuff of 


50 


THE OWL-TRAPPER’S CHRISTMAS 


which men are made. A person whose only ambi- 
tion is to chew tobacco, expectorate further than his 
fellows on another man’s stove, and lounge around 
a bar waiting for another man to treat, naturally does 
not grasp such intricate problems. Perhaps to such 
a person’s credit there is blood, which tells. Perhaps 
the son of a clergyman inherits blood brewed 
from the cauldron of universities and enriched 
on the forum, at the bedsides of the sick and dying ; 
blood made heroic on the field of battle, the sands 
of Palestine, in the midst of contagion, and in the 
fights with sin. I will not say. I only know that 
he who works wins, whether he be a son of pov- 
erty or of wealth. 

Out on the vast plains of snow, skirting the 
forests, climbing the ice mounds, went Jim, the 
owl-trapper. 

Owls ! What are owls ? 

Is there value in these bunches of feathers and 
muscles that make the nights hideous and the 
forests terrible ? So queried Jim. The only 
answer was in the affirmative, debate it as he might. 
There was no work to be had. As the snows 
deepened and poverty tightened, his attention was 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


51 


attracted to the corner where hung the old musket, 
rusty and interwoven with cobwebs. He took it 
from its long resting-place, cleaned it until it shone, 
and exchanged with the grocer for ammunition 
out of his slender savings. Out in the forests he 
tramped, his little feet and legs sinking far into the 
soft snows, which at times and places reached to 
his chin. He came home at night with four ruffed 
grouse. He tramped to a distant and large village 
the next day, and returned with a dollar and a half 
which he had received for his birds. It was a 
great triumph, a fortune in his grasp. He repeated 
the operation until grouse grew scarce and difficult 
to secure. 

One day he locked out of the forest over a 
large field. He had been hunting rabbits with 
indifferent success. His attention was attracted 
to a stump on a mound in the centre of the field 
on which was a big white object. He walked 
toward it to satisfy his curiosity. It assumed 
form as he approached. It arose in the air and 
flew out of gun range. He had never seen such 
a bird before. He pursued it in wonder. The 
field was surrounded by four stone walls. The 


52 


THE OWL-TRAPPER’S CHRISTMAS. 


bird alighted on one of these beside its mate. As 
he approached, the two birds flew and joined two 
others at the wall at the end of the field. He 
crawled near, but the four birds flew to a point 
where two others were sitting on the wall opposite 
to the first site. He flushed eight in all, which 
seemed to fly only from stump to wall and from 
wall to stump. He could see now that the birds 
were owls, larger than turkeys, with big heads, 
without eartufts, some pure white, others speckled 
with black on the tips of their feathers. He 
went home with his rabbits and his suggestion. 
The blacksmith sold him a light steel trap, which 
he set on the stump that .very night. He argued 
that this stump was a favorite watch-tower for 
these birds, and the first one to alight would be 
his prey. He argued rightly. The next morning 
he took home to share the barn with the amazed 
cow a large and beautiful owl, which tried to set 
its powerful talons in his arms and legs, and to 
snap him with his beak. He soon had the entire 
flock of owls, and they were beauties at which the 
neighborhood marveled, and which his mother 
both feared and admired. At the village where 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. t>3 

he sold his game he found a book in the academy 
library that described them as snowy owls which 
descend from the Arctic regions in winter in quest 
of rabbits and grouse. The book also told of 
museums filled with stuffed birds, mammals, rep- 
tiles, insects, fishes and with other curiosities ; and 
zoological gardens where these animals were kept 
alive. The first suggestion was supplemented by 
others, which taught him that both stuffed and live 
animals had a value. Then he purchased from 
the bookstore a work on taxidermy, and began to 
oractice on stray winter species such as wood- 
peckers, chickadees, creepers, pine finches, pine 
grosbeaks, crossbills, bluejays, nutchatches, etc. 
He succeeded in learning how to skin birds and 
preserve the skins with arsenic. It was more dif- 
ficult to mount them, and he gave up the project, 
with a few exceptions, because he learned from 
his book that there is a cash value for skins, as 
well as mounted birds. He learned, also, that of 
all birds, live owls, and their skins, are most valu- 
able and marketable, and he undertook to hunt 
for them instead of grouse. The live owls 
required fresh meat to keep them alive, and often 


54 


THE OWL-TRAPPER’S CHRISTMAS. 


he had to tramp all the way to the distant village 
to secure refuse from the butcher shops. He 
wrote to the principal taxidermists and zoological 
gardens of New York, Philadelphia and Boston, 
concerning his prizes, and then the heavy winter 
shut the little hamlet out of the busy world. One 
answer alone reached him. It was from Central 
Park, New York, and was not encouraging. It 
stated that the Park did not purchase its curiosi- 
ties, but occasionally some gentleman of wealth 
made purchases and donated them to the 
menagerie. 

The middle of December was at hand at the 
time of the opening of this story. The snows 
were so deep, and the air so cold, that Jimmy 
could scarcely reach the village once a week, and 
often but once in two weeks, for bird food. Still 
he tramped, caught owls in his trap alive, and shot 
others. His museum had become a burden on 
the mind of his mother, but still he persisted, and 
lived contentedly on milk and potatoes. At last 
his mother was compelled to deny him milk, and 
potatoes formed his only diet. Still the brood of 
owls increased, and the collection of skins 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


65 


enlarged. There were snowy owls ; horned owls, 
dark brown in color, with long ear-tufts, and of 
size but little inferior to that of the snowy owls ; 
screech owls, no larger than a dove, with little ear- 
tufts and brown mottled feathers ; acadian owls, 
still smaller, about the size of a robin, with seal- 
brown coats, and as beautiful as a bird can be ; 
barn owls, with long slender legs and slim napes, 
which the farmers declare to be old Nick himself 
in wings ; short-eared owls, with no tufts at all ; 
long-eared owls, with long tufts, the last two being 
about half as large as the horned owl, but of dif- 
ferent habits (the short-eared owl is a field bird 
and the long-eared owl a wood bird) ; hawk owls, 
with rings around the eyes, resembling the hawk, 
but with larger heads ; and even a pair of great 
gray owls, the largest and rarest of North Ameri- 
can species, with very large heads and bodies — 
feather bodies of course — birds that live in the 
Arctic regions, and seldom visit the States except 
in the most severe winters, when they are driven 
south for food. 

Christmas arrived at last, and Jimmy was in 
despair, not only about the family larder, but that 


56 


THE OWL-TRAPPER’S CHRISTMAS. 


of his owls and the cow. All were pinched for 
food, and, of late, the question of a Christmas din- 
ner settled down into the question of any kind of 
a dinner. 

About noon on that day the postmaster’s store 
was enlivened by the appearance af a real, live 
stranger. He was a fine, vigorous old gentleman, 
carefully muffled in sealskins and robed with a 
heavy buffalo-skin overcoat. A blizzard was rag- 
ing that appalled the most courageous, and even 
the old gentleman himself wondered how he ever 
reached this buried locality, how he could get out 
and almost why he came. 

“Can you tell me,” he inquired, respectfully, 
“where Mr. James Child lives ?” 

There was a pause of mute astonishment, and 
then some of the loafers guffawed. The post- 
master flushed in half shame and remarked: “I 
reckon you mean Jimmy, the owl-trapper, as he is 
called hereabouts. He isn’t spoken of that 
away in which you speak, no disrespect tho’, ” he 
added, apologetically. * “ He lives with his ma, in 
the little cottage down the road yender, beyont 
the tavern, a quarter mile I reckon it.” 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


57 


After the stranger had bowed his thanks, with 
berhaps a trifle of amusement visible even behind 
his heavy mufflers, and had gone, the loafers hotly 
discussed the situation for the rest of the day ; in 
fact the sensation has never since ceased to be a 
subject of reference. But the result of the talk on 
that day was, that “Jim war smart arter all said 
an’ done.” 

Meantime the stranger made his way slowly 
and with much labor to the Child cottage. The 
storm was so terrific that even Jimmy had not 
ventured out, and was discussing with his mother 
the propriety of experimenting with owls as food 
for hungry stomachs. 

“ Better kill a few Jimmy, dear,” said she. 
“ Perhaps they won’t be so bad in a pie, and you 
can save the skins.’’ 

“ But mother, dear, you have no flour to make 
the crusts with.” 

The good woman sighed. “ That is true, 
Jimmy,” she admitted. “ We will have to make 
soup of them.” 

“ Very well,” said the now distracted boy, “ I 
will go and kill two.” 


68 


THE OWL-TRAPPER’S CHRISTMAS. 


There was a startling rap at the door. “ Come 
in,” sang out Jimmy, glad at even an interruption 
and delay. 

The door opened and the stranger walked in. 
He stood hesitatingly an instant, and asked, “ Is 
this where Mr. James Child lives ? ” 

The mother smiled. “ That’s you, Jimmy, I 
guess. Won’t you take off your wraps, sir, and 
draw up to the fire ? It’s a fearful day out, and I 
didn’t suppose any one could stand it.” 

The gentleman removed his buffalo furs and over- 
shoes, and took the proffered chair near the stove. 
“ Yes,” he said, “ it is fearful weather. No 
sensible man would venture out in it ; but men 
have their hobbies and passions, you know, and I 
have mine. I came up to the village near here 
from New York. Our train was two days getting 
over the last thirty miles. I have been snowed in 
at the village, but finally concluded to come here, 
if for no other reason, because I wanted entertain- 
ment of some kind. Lively entertainment it was, 
too. I guess, if you can accommodate me, I will 
remain with you a few days until the storm 
is passed.” 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


59 


The widow and Jimmy looked at him and each 
other in dismay. “ But, sir,” gasped Jimmy, “ we 
have nothing to eat except potatoes. I was about 
killing some of my live owls” — he paused and 
blushed — “ for dinner.” 

The stranger laughed heartily. Then, seeing 
the pain he had caused, he stopped abruptly, and 
taking out a wallet containing a large roll of bills, 
selected a ten- dollar note. 

“ Here,” he said to the boy, “ if your mother 
will take my account -in advance, run over to the 
store and spend it all for things eatable. Why, 
bless my soul ! the idea of killing your owls ! I 
would rather have my own head cut off. ” 

The mother and son laughed with joy. “ Run, 
Jimmy,” said she, “ and do as he tells you. You 
have saved us from despair,” she added to the 
stranger. “It would destroy Jimmy’s hopes to 
kill his owls.” 

“ His hopes ? ” 

“ Why, yes, sir. He’s an ambitious boy, and 
has been trapping live owls and saving the skins 
of the dead ones to get some money to prepare 
him for college. He paid off the mortgage on this 


60 


THE OWL-TRAPPER’S CHRISTMAS. 


house and lot, so we own it, and has learned all the 
district school can teach him besides. I let him 
have his own way, so when he becomes a man he 
cannot blame me for obstructing his future.” 

“ He must be a smart lad, indeed,” said the old 
gentleman, gravely ; “ a chip of some old block, 
isn’t he ? ” 

“ Why I guess so. His father was a smart 
clergyman in his prime, and occupied some big 
pulpits before they left him to shift for himself 
and us.” 

“ What was his father’s name ? ” 

“ James Henry Child.” 

“You don’t say!” mused the old gentleman. 
“ Why I taught a class in his Sunday-school in 
Troy when I was a young man. He was then our 
best speaker. And thus our old war-horses are 
left alone to perish ! ” 

Jimmy, the grocer, and his fat son, came at this 
point, straining under the burden of flour, hams, 
codfish, and all the rest of it. Jimmy’s eyes were 
bulging out with joy and anticipation. While the 
widow prepared the meal the stranger conversed 
with Jimmy, who was eagerly eating cookies. 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


61 


“ I want to see your owls,” said the stranger. 

“ Shall I bring them in or will you go to 
the barn ? ” 

“ To the barn.” 

Jimmy cautiously opened the barn-door. As 
the old gentleman’s eyes gradually became accus- 
tomed to the dim light, he was amazed at the 
spectacle before him. There were owls on the 
floor, on the rafters, on the cows back, and on the 
manger, snapping at the intruders, raising their 
wings threateningly and glaring through their 
great' round eyes. The stranger gazed and gazed, 
his evident delight knowing no bounds. The 
rarer species, such as the snowy, great grey, and 
hawk owls, filled him with amazement and made 
him almost boyish in his pleasure. 

“ Now let me see your skins ?” he asked. 

They returned to the house and Jimmy showed 
him a room, the floor of which was covered with 
owl skins. They sat down to dinner and when 
Jimmy was sufficiently fed to talk well the old 
gentleman asked, “ How many owls have you ? ” 

“ There are seventy-five alive, and over one 
hundred skins.” 


62 


THE OWL-TRAPPER’S CHRISTMAS. 


“ Have you any idea of their value ? ” 

“ No, sir.” 

“Well,” remarked the stranger, ” I should say 
that the live owls average $10 each, that is $? 5 o in 
all ; that the skins are worth about $ 2 . 5 o each or 
$2 5 o in all, a total of #1000. Come to think, a pair 
of great gray owls are worth, alive, #2 5 o. Now I 
am one of the patrons of Central Park. Some 
patrons donate great paintings, some mammals, 
or woods, or birds’ eggs, or stuffed birds, or some 
other thing which is their hobby. Mr. Vanderbilt 
presented it with great paintings which cost a 
a fortune ; and so has the Stewart estate and 
others. Mr. Morris K. Jessup had all of the 
world’s monkeys, apes and their kin collected 
by the Wards of Rochester, and stuffed at an 
expense of perhaps more than $200,000. My 
hobby is hawks and owls, particularly live ones. 
Now if I deposit for you the sum of $i,2 5o in the 
bank at the village, I think you can afford to let 
me have your collection. In addition, if you will 
help me to get them safely to New York, I will 
pay you well for your time and also your 
expenses.” 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


63 


The old gentleman beamed kindly on his 
audience, but it was suffused with tears of joy. 
The widow was holding her son in her arms. 
Even the Christmas dinner was forgotten for the 
moment. 


U/ay to /T\arry. 


Henry T. Henry was in love with an English 
rector's daughter. The rector, Sir Hugh Gentry, 
was forty years old. His daughter, Miss Mary, 
was the loveliest girl of the parish, for whom the 
fond parents entertained the highest hopes in the 
matter of matrimony. It scandalized his pathetic 
soul that his daughter should smile on Henry, 
who had a peculiar record. Henry was, it is true, 
the wealthiest gentleman of the parish, but had a 
fondness for fast horses. Not only was his love of 
the race track a commodity of gossip in English 
society, but his prowess, as a man of great physique. 
He often chastised men, with wagging tongues, 
with his well trained knuckles, which were feared 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


65 


as if they were a trip-hammer. However, he loved 
Mary Gentry more than all his horses, dogs, guns, 
companions and himself. 

Mary loved him as truly. The twain agreed 
that if she could countenance his sporting pro- 
clivities, he could put up with her religious 
devotion. With these startling differences of 
taste and a scandalized parent in the way, 
they determined to marry in spite of the — well, 
the devil. Mr. Henry thought he could manage 
the irate sire if Mary would leave the matter to 
him. 

And Mary confidingly left it to him. 

The day of elopement was set. The family of 
the rector were gathered around the peaceful fire- 
side one stormy afternoon. Sir Hugh was study- 
ing the points for his next .Sunday’s sermon when 
he was startled by the tramp of a horse. He 
glanced out of the window in time to see Henry 
spring from a magnificent charger and command it 
to stand still. The door opened and the great 
athlete stalked in. Taking the young lady by 
the hand he walked in before the astonished 


rector. 


3 


66 


ONE WAY TO MARRY. 


“ Mr. Gentry,” said Henry, calmly, “ I come to 
wed with your daughter.” 

“ Really, sir,” thundered the rector, in sudden 
anger, “ this is a new form of proposal.” 

“It is no proposal at all. It is a statement 
of fact. Will you perform the ceremony at 
once or compel me to find another clergy- 
man ? ” 

“ Out of my house,” roared Sir Hugh, “ I had 
rather see you married to the scaffold than my 
daughter.” 

The reply was enough for Henry T. Henry. 
He pinioned the arms of Sir Hugh, took him 
out of doors and tiecf him to a tree. Meantime 
Mrs. Gentry had aroused the servants. Henry 
went in for his bride, and as he passed out 
with her was met at the door by two stout men 
armed with clubs. In an instant he knocked them 
down, pushed his way through the screaming 
females and mounted his steed with Miss Mary 
seated firmly behind him. They rode to the near- 
est clergyman and were married without further 
incident. 

Sir Hugh nursed his wrath for some time, 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


67 


and then, overcome by the daring consummation 
of the affair, made peace with his son-in-law. 
Henry T. Henry, after his marriage, lived a 
decorous life, and the' couple were the happiest in 
England* 


faster Bud$. 


“ Oh, if we only had some roses ! ” 

“ What a solemn garb for Easter ; nothing but 
evergreens, artificial flowers and house-plants ! ” 

“ But we will have some geraniums anyhow ! ” 

“ Yes and we can borrow a few calla lilies ! ” 

“ Now girls, it is all well enough to talk about 
house-plants, but we all know that they can only 
stand around, as it were, without taking an active 
part in the beautiful services. If we had plenty of 
roses, as they do in New York, we could make all 
kinds of things, crosses, bells, hearts, banks and 
inscriptions.” 

It will be observed by the very acute, that four 
young ladies had spoken five times in as many 
minutes. Further observation will be in effect that 
one speaker began and ended these exclamations. 

68 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


69 


She was Miss Marie Wentworth, the leading belle 
of the village of Wentworth. Of course her 
family was the oldest as it had named the place, and 
her father was the magnate, as he possessed the 
most money, the most fashionable residence and 
and had the largest business interests, and besides, 
touched the key which unlocked the political 
prestige. Miss Marie was the beauty of Went- 
worth and had she not known it by intuition and 
reflections from her own mirror, there were plenty 
of people to tell her all about it. The other three 
girls were respectively Misses Maud Langdon, 
Kathryn Griggs and Lily Doane, her pet coterie, 
who, as it will be observed, had adopted the fashion- 
able spelling of their Christian nomenclature, except 
Miss Langdon, who had neglected to change her 
name from Maud to Maudlyn. It is unnecessary 
to say that they were discussing the decorations 
for Easter of the local Episcopal Church, or Grace 
Church, as it was termed, and had met in its 
drawing-room several weeks in advance of the 
calendarial day. 

“ I have an idea ! ” exclaimed Miss Wentworth, 
delightedly. “ We are but four, it is true, but we 


70 


EASTER BUDS. 


have a total of at least twenty-five admirers, young 
men who allege a willingness to die for us. I pro- 
pose that we serve a notice on all the young people 
for a meeting here to-morrow night. When we 
get them corralled we will inform the young men 
that the price of our future friendship is their 
personal effort to get us plenty of roses with which 
to deck the church. They ought, as a whole, to 
be able to cover the interior of the sanctuary.” 

“ Oh, won’t it be glorious ! ” exclaimed in 
delight the remaining three. 

“ Certainly,’’ said the demure Miss Langdon. 
“ They can raise money sufficient to purchase in 
New York all the flowers necessary.” 

Wentworth, it may be stated, was a northern 
New York village where Easter invariably 
witnessed deep snows. In the west, Wentworth 
would have been a regularly incorporated city, as 
it contained some 9,000 inhabitants, but the laws of 
New York State forbade municipal ambition in 
villages of such size. '' 

On the next evening, the young men and women 
of the church convened. The proposition was very 
cleverly put to the young men to whom it seemed 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


71 


on first consideration a very easy matter to 
purchase a New York conservatory and remove its 
contents to Wentworth. Mr. Henry Havens was 
the richest young man of the place and the 
cynosure of all feminine eyes. His will was con- 
sequently much of the law of the church youth. 
When the proposition was put he immediately 
arose and remarked: 

“ We can settle this question in a few minutes 
to the satisfaction of all. I know in advance what 
the result will be, for I have New York florists’ 
bills and experiences to look to for information. 
I refrain from advance comment,” he added, with 
an almost imperceptible sneer. “ I will simply 
telegraph to the leading florist of the metropolis, 
and his answer will reach us before the meeting 
has adjourned.” 

The idea was received with favor, and the 
young man’s stock had a decided advance. While 
the telegram was awaiting an answer, the assem- 
blage gradually broke into couples, quartettes and 
groups. There was one young man who walked 
about in a restless way, his eyes alternately showing 
determination and despair. He was Mr. Charles 


72 


EASTER BUDS. 


Francis Preston, a rising young lawyer of the 
place, and it was known that his ambitions included 
a series of high offices from the County Judgeship 
to that of the Supreme Justiceship of the United 
States. There was one ambition dearer to him 
than all' else. He was desperately in love with 
Miss Marie Wentworth, and she knew it and 
almost felt at times the force and magnetic work- 
ings of his affection on her own heart, He was 
not very well off in this world’s goods and her 
attention was distracted by the ardent wooing of 
Mr. Henry Havens, the unmarried aristocrat and 
star of Wentworth. The respective families were 
in favor of a union between the Wentworths and 
Havens, and all together there was but a little, a 
very little straw in favor of the aspiring young 
Preston. He slipped out of the drawing-room into 
the great dark auditorium of the church, into which 
only the light of the drawing-room penetrated 
through the open door, and sat down in a cushioned 
pew. He mused in deep thought for some time 
when suddenly he heard voices and saw in the 
body of the light issuing through the open door, 
the forms of Miss Wentworth and Mr. Havens. 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


73 


The couple walked directly down the aisle beside 
him and as they passed he was compelled to hear 
several sentences that cut him like a knife and yet 
eased his despair. 

“ You know, Marie/’ the young man was say- 
ing in almost contemptuous tones, “ that this whole 
scheme is ridiculous and absurd. The answer will 
prove what I say, that the flowers cannot be got, 
and if they could, would cost a fortune. The idea 
of compelling me to secure them as the cost of 
your love is preposterous. If the sum involved is 
all, say so and I will draw you a check to-night.” 

“Mr. Havens!” gasped the girl, indignantly. 
“As if my father hasn’t wealth enough! Your 
check indeed ! I have set my heart on these flowers 
and I thought for my sake you would be willing to 
make some sacrifice, say nothing for the church. 
When a woman is once married it is doubtful in 
this cold age if she can expect her husband to 
make sacrifices for her desires and I propose to 
see in advance what I can expect of a man. 
There, now, I shall return to the drawing-room at 
once.” 

Mr. Preston arose, his head in a whirl. “ Make 


74 


EASTER BUDS. 


sacrifices for that woman ! ” he thought. “ Why, 
I would like to live for the sake of doing nothing 
else. If I had that man’s money I would take the 
first train to New York and buy out a conserva- 
tory. I wonder if she would give me an opportu- 
nity ?” 

He returned to the drawing-room and went to 
her side. She was sitting quite alone, her face 
still flushed with silent indignation. She gave him 
her hand in almost gratitude but instantly with- 
drew it as his very touch seemed to thrill her with 
the intensity of the love and magnetism that was 
devouring this admirer. 

“ Miss Wentworth,” he said in a low voice, “ I 
owe you an explanation. I was sitting in the 
sanctuary and obliged to listen to some of your 
conversation with Mr. Havens. Overwhelmed 
with desire to get you the flowers you want — 
it seemed so little to do for you — I was power- 
less to reveal my presence.” 

“ And you think it but a little to do for me ?” 
she replied, almost tenderly, ignoring his explana- 
tion. 

“ Oh, so little ! ’’’ he said, eagerly, “ and I will 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES, 


75 


try and do it for you,” he continued with the ear- 
nestness of despair. 

He turned away abruptly as the announcement 
of the arrival of the telegram was made at that 
instant. 

“ That is real love ! ” she thought, and the great 
pleasure of it did not leave her thereafter. 

Mr. Havens arose with the telegram in his 
hand. His face bore a triumphant expression and 
he glanced at Miss Wentworth with a perceptible 
leer. “ I will ask the rector to read this tele- 
gram," he said. 

The rector read as follows : “ At this season of 
the year it would ordinarily cost $8,000 for roses 
sufficient to decorate your entire church on the 
scale suggested. It being near to Easter time, all 
flowers in this region have been purchased in 
advance, and you could not secure them at any 
price.” 

A murmur of astonishment ran through the 
assemblage and the young people dispersed laugh- 
ing at the absurdity of the scheme of the four 
girls. In fact the whole village had more than a 
week of fun at their expense and they kept out of 


76 


EASTER BUDS. 


sight, Miss Wentworth feeling particularly sore, 
embarrassed and disappointed. She would not 
see Mr. Havens, the partial cause of her trouble, 
and as for Mr. Preston, she heard he had gone out 
of town. 

One morning, about a week before Easter, Miss 
Wentworth, in answer to a summons from the 
rector, entered the sanctuary of Grace Church, 
To her utmost astonishment and delight, there 
were the aisles, pews and altar covered with 
masses of rose buds of all colors, species and 
descriptions, and odors of the moss, cloth-of-gold, 
Marechal Neil, La France, Jacks, and all the rest 
of them beat upon her wondering senses in over- 
whelming deliciousness. The buds were all 
arranged in pasteboard boxes. On a box at her 
feet was an envelope on which her name was 
written. Hastily she opened it and found a sim- 
ple card labled : 

To Miss Marie Wentworth. 

THIS CHURCH FULL OF ROSES, WITH THE COMPLIMENTS OF A 
FRIEND. 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


77 


Tears of joy, surprise and pleasure suffused her 
eyes. Here was triumph over Mr. Havens and a 
chance to turn the laugh on the village. Running 
into the rectory she caught the good rector’s arm 
and beseechingly asked an explanation. 

“ Here Preston,” called out the rector, “ take 
Miss Wentworth into the church and tell her all 
about it.” 

Mr. Preston came bashfully from an inner room, 
whither he had fled at her approach, his face crim- 
son as a winter sunset. 

“ This is your donor, Miss Wentworth,” said 
the good man, and he gently pushed them through 
his private entrance into the church and left them. 

For some moments not a word was said. They 
simply looked at each other and the flowers alter- 
nately. Then the young man spoke. 

“ Perhaps I had best leave you to summon 
your companions and arrange the decorations.” 

“ No,” she replied, gently but firmly, “ I want to 
hear all about it first.” 

“ There is but little to tell,” he replied. “ On 
the night after the assembly I went to that smiling 
area which skirts the Gulf of Mexico. Not far 


78 


EASTER BUDS. 


from Pensacola I found the vast farm of my old 
uncle who was living in a semi-tropical paradise. 

To him I stated the case while the charming old 
fellow pressed my hand again and again and 
chuckled all over with laughter and pleasure. 

“ ‘ Now, my boy,’ said he, ‘ I can help you out. 
You can cover that church with roses inside and 
out. There are hundreds of square miles of roses 
along this coast in bloom all the while. The more 
roses we cut off the stems the more buds appear 
and bloom, very like the sea anemone, you know. 
A little salt will keep roses fresh for several weeks. 
I’ll tell you what. You can charter a car for a 
comparatively small sum. I and my help will pack 
it full of rose-buds, with their stems in salt, and 
you can take them North safely to bloom on 
Easter day.’ 

“ I knew before I left Wentworth that uncle had 
acres and acres of roses, and had hoped for some 
scheme to help me get some flowers here. Gladly 
I tried his suggestion. When the car reached 
Wentworth it was still a week before Easter and 
the rose-buds were in superb condition and had 
not opened. It can now be arranged to have 


SPECTACULAR ROMANCES. 


79 


them all blossom on Easter day. On the night of 
my arrival, I had the buds surreptitiously removed 
into the sanctuary. No one save the rector and 
ourselves know anything about it. No one need 
ever know anything about it. You can call in 
your friends and simply say you managed to get 
the flowers and arrange them according to your 
own sweet will. Now will you let me depart ? ” 
The last sentence was spoken in tremulous fear 
that she would let him go. 

“ Not yet, Mr. Preston. I am not so mean, I 
hope, as to let your kind intentions be carried out. 
Further, I shall tell every one the whole story, and 
Charles,” she said, abruptly and impulsively, grasp- 
ing his arm with her beautiful little hand, “ I shall 
say that you are the dearest, sweetest and grandest 
man in the world.” 

“ Marie ! ” he exclaimed, his face white with 
emotion. That was all, save that in an instant 
they were in each other’s arms and passionate 
kisses caused the reddest roses to blush in a 
symposium of rapture. 

“ Sweet one,” he' murmured at last, “ can we not 
be married oh Easter day in the midst of these 


80 


EASTER BUDS. 


flowers and pass our honeymoon in that paradise 
on the Gulf coast, at my uncle’s ? ” 

She turned her face and saw all the rose-buds 
nodding approval, heard their promise to open and 
blossom on her wedding day and listened to their 
far-off companions calling her to come. 

“ It shall be done,” she said. 

On that beautiful Easter morn roses blossomed 
on her bridal gown where her companions placed 
them, blossomed all over the sanctuary and altar 
where they were married, blossomed in the special 
car that bore them to the perfumed sea, and 
blossomed all through the rapturous honeymoon 
that began on the morn which celebrates the 
ascension of our blessed Lord. 







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